How can I proceed with a divorce if I don’t know where my husband is?
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How can I proceed with a divorce if I don’t know where my husband is?
He was the sole provider for our family and about 10 months ago abandoned us – no food, no shelter, no money, nothing. He resurfaced 4 months later and talked to his children, still no child support. He would not disclose where he was. He disappeared again 3 months ago. I don’t know where he is; I have attempted to contact previous employers, family, friends, and even apartment managers. I have no way to get ahold of him, so how can I proceed with a divorce?
Asked on July 6, 2015 under Family Law, New Mexico
Answers:
M.D., Member, California and New York Bar / FreeAdvice Contributing Attorney
Answered 8 years ago | Contributor
Even though you can't locate your husband, legal actioncannot taken against a person without giving them an opportunity to explain their side. Accordingly, notice must be givenof any legal action. In a situation such as this, a missing spouse must still must be informed of the divorce action before it can proceed. This is accomplished by what is caaled a "divorce by publication".
As a general rule in most jurisdictions, the filing spouse (i.e. "petitioner") must make a diligent effort to find their missing spouse (i.e. "respondent"). They will have to present proof to a court that they made every effort to search for them. Typically they will have to show that they checked with family/friends, voting records, the phone book, DMV, and any other source that would likely lead to uncovering their current location (such as checking with former landlords, as you have already done).
At that point, the petitioner will be allowed to serve the repondent by publishing notice of the divorce in a newspaper. The court will instruct you which paper(s) to use. Typically it will be in one that is in the area of their last known whereabouts.
In most states, the respondent has 30-60 days to file an answer after the first day of publication. If they fail to respond within that timeframe, the petitioner can file a request to enter a "default dissolution" of the marriage (i.e. divorce). Generally it is granted upon the terms that the petitioner requests, such as alimony and child support (although the respondent is given a certain time in which they can appeal the divorce or its terms).
At this point you should consult further with a divorce attorney in your area. They can best advise as to specific state law.
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