How do I get my wife to leave when I want a divorce and she doesn’t?

UPDATED: Nov 14, 2011

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How do I get my wife to leave when I want a divorce and she doesn’t?

We have 2 small children. My wife kicked me out of the bedroom 5 years ago; I’ve been sleeping in the basement. She says that if she leaves I’ll never see my kids again. She is an alcoholic and is very physical toward me in front of the kids. Where should I start?

Asked on November 14, 2011 under Family Law, Oklahoma


M.T.G., Member, New York Bar / FreeAdvice Contributing Attorney

Answered 11 years ago | Contributor

I am so sorry for your situation.  You need to start by seeking help from an attorney in your area.  What you need to do is to file for divorce and file for temporary custody of the children given your wife's alcoholism and abusive behaviour.  You are also going to ask for the court to award you temporary occupancy of the marital home  Now, I do not know all the details of your life here.  If your wife is a stay at home Mom and primary caretaker of the kids it may be that you will need to come up with a plan here as to who will watch the - like a Grandparent or Aunt - and allege that it is in "the best interest of the children."  What if she drinks and drives with them in the car?  And believe me she can not take the kids from you.  You are entitled under the law to have joint custody of the kids.  Good luck. 

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