How can I get physical custody of my son?

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How can I get physical custody of my son?

I have joint custody of my daughter and son. His father has physical custody. But I’m afraid that the state will end up with my our son. He is always in trouble at school and is in and out of court. He makes straight Fs and his father will not hold him back. He is not getting the education he needs. Is there any chance I can get custody. His father tells him he will go to the state before me. What should I do?

Asked on January 16, 2012 under Family Law, California

Answers:

M.T.G., Member, New York Bar / FreeAdvice Contributing Attorney

Answered 9 years ago | Contributor

First, take a deep breath.  You son will not go to the state before he goes to you unless the state deemd you to be an unfit parent.  That is a difficult thing to prove.  Now, if you believe that your son is in an environment that is unhealthy and that your ex is not making the best decisions for him, seek legal help to modify the custody order and obtain physical custody of your son.  You have not stated how old your son is at this point in time.  If he is of a certain age then his desire to live with one parent or another will be taken in to account.  That is a decision for both you and your attorney to make.  Now I caution you: if you try and obtain custody of one child and not the other there will be hard feeling to over come.  Unless your daughter is an extraordinarily mature child she will think some where with in the recesses of her mind that you chose you son over her.  You need to deal with this issue with the same amount of importance as your helping your son.  Good luck.


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